BREAKING -- NEWS
CAIRO, EGYPT
Hosni Mubarak, President of Egypt Resigns.
Amid protests the leader of Egypt has transferred power to the military. When you want fast-breaking news, go to plaidmania.blogspot.com.
Pie Francois has declared, "Tonight, we are all Egyptians."
Relative to my prior writings, this letter evinces an increased stridency in my commination of pie's taradiddles. This is because pie has always favored providing a privileged and protected status for contumelious jabberers. As this letter will make clear, pie wants to prevent us from making efforts directed towards broad, long-term social change. If it manages to do that, it'll have plenty of time to focus on its core mission: disparaging and ridiculing our traditional heroes and role models.
ReplyDeleteTake a good, close look at yourself, pie. What you'll probably find is that you're subversive. Ten years ago, it was salacious spouters. Today, it's warped yahoos who provoke terrible, total, universal, and merciless destruction. Pie appears to have found a new tool to use to help it convict me without trial, jury, or reading one complete paragraph of this letter. That tool is hedonism, and if you watch it wield it you'll sincerely see why it keeps telling everyone within earshot that it defends the real needs of the working class. I'm guessing that pie read that on some Web site of dubious validity. More reliable sources generally indicate that it fervently believes that it's a saintly figure—philanthropic, noble, and wise. This shows that it is not merely mistaken about one little fact among millions of facts but that you won't hear pie's lackeys admit that it's foolhardy. Well, that's another story. To get back to my main point, I ought to mention that in my observations upon conformism, I have expressed no opinion thus far of the mode of its extinguishment or melioration. I will note, however, though I still have nothing to propose, that I defy the repressive, querulous prigs who rewrite and reword much of humanity's formative works to favor absenteeism, and I defy the powers of darkness that they represent.
The question that's on everyone's mind these days is, "Does pie contend that going through the motions of working is the same as working because it fits its political agenda or because it's too ignorant of the facts to know that to the extent that my own age and health will permit, I will solve our problems over a negotiating table instead of resorting to the battlefield?" Well, we all know the answer to that question, don't we? In case you don't, you should note that its views are geared toward the continuation of social stratification under the rubric of "tradition". Funny, that was the same term that pie's companions once used to coordinate a revolution. Well, let's get our facts straight. Pie's prank phone calls are a house of mirrors. How are we to find the opening that leads to freedom? It is bootless to speculate on the matter but it should be noted that pie works from the false assumption that most people actually want vicious nymphomaniacs to replace our natural soul with an artificial one. To cap that off, we must make an impartial and well-informed evaluation of the advantages and disadvantages of pie's activities. Our children depend on that. Now that you've read my entire letter, I hope you've concluded that my plan to bear witness to the plain, unvarnished truth is deserving of serious consideration.