Four More Pies

Four More Pies

Thursday, June 3, 2010

Loya Jirga Declared A Success


In the early hours of Thursday June 3, 2010, a Loya Jirga (Grand Council) was conducted in Second Life. This Loya Jirga was one of the most successful in the history of all Loya Jirgas. Though, the Jirga did begin with some controversies.

Solomon Chakrabarti started off cursing Pie Francois's mustache. (Cursing a mustache is an insult in the Arab world.) Mr. Francois explained to Solomon that this was absurd because Pie did not have a mustache at the moment of the curse.

Also, Fang Aries showed up with black duct tape over her breasts. This was due to over the misinterpretation of the Loya Jirga, which she had thought was a Royal Jerk Off.

It is important to note that this particular Loya Jirga had in attendance more women than men.

In the middle of the Jirga that lasted about 20 minutes, Solomon, Deano, and Quinby decided it would be good for a magic carpet ride. Then pizza and pop was served.

The members of the Loya Jirga were Deano, Quinby, Amanita, Pie, Fang, Bella, and Solomon.

Six resolutions were accepted by the Loya Jirga.
1. We will blame Israel for ANY of our problems.
2. Plaidistan will be established next to one of the other Stans in the region (perhaps Ihateyoustan).
3. The Lollipops for AK-47s and Poppies initiative will be implemented.
4. Allowing young men to have their hair cut in the "Titanic" style.
5. Deciding who keeps the liquor from the Kabul Hotel.
6. Choosing the players of the National Buzkashi Team (the sport where men ride on horses and use a headless carcass of a goat or calf as a ball, similar to polo).

"All in all, this Loya Jirga was fun. We definitely should do this another time. Perhaps we should do this with more people," said Pie Francois.

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